Great Googly Moogly
by NekoSama
Summary: Bobby tries to cure Darien of his arachnophobia in his own unique way. Please R


Great Googly Moogly  
Fanfic by: NekoSama (aka Chris)   
Email: nekosama@ix.netcom.com  
Category: Humor  
Rating: PG  
Summary: Bobby tries to cure Darien of his arachnophobia in his own unique way  
Spoilers: Mild spoilage for the movie 'Eight Legged Freaks'  
Standard disclaimer: The Invisible Man and all the characters are not mine and are used without permission. I am not getting paid for this.  
  
  
  
A/N: I went and saw 'Eight Legged Freaks' tonight. *ME*... someone who is about as arachnophobic as they come. Anyway, this idea hit me when I got home so I *HAD* to write it. Keep in mind while reading this, it's about 4AM when I started writing, so my brain is doing the wacky. Feedback is welcome, even if it's just to say --- Neko, you NEED some better meds. :)  
  
  
  
Darien paced in Bobby's office while he waited for him to finish writing his report on their latest mission.   
  
"Would you stop that. You're driving me nuts," Bobby told him and then went back to his work.  
  
"That wouldn't be a very long drive now would it?" Darien teased as he sat down.  
  
"Very funny, Fawkes. I am no way as crazy as you used to get when you went red eye," he pointed out.  
  
"OK... ok... just hurry up. I'd like to AH---!!" Darien leapt up and quicksilvered when a small spider suddenly dropped into his lap from the ceiling.   
  
The spider went flying and landed on Bobby's desk and he smacked the offending creature with a file. "It's dead now. You can come back."  
  
"Hang on. Damn fat man need to fumigate this place, then again he's too cheap to pay for something like that," Darien groused.  
  
"You are correct about that, my friend," Bobby sighed when Darien came back into view. He smiled as an idea sprang to mind. He set his pen down and went over to his partner. "You know I have a plan on how to cure you of your spider hang up."  
  
"Hobbes, it's a phobia. You can't just make it go away overnight," he countered, VERY nervous about the look in Bobby's eyes.  
  
"Oh, ye of little faith. Come on," he insisted and pulled Darien out the door, leading him to the van.  
  
Darien was intrigued as Bobby started up the tired, old, beast driving them away from The Agency. He gave him a curious look when they pulled into the Horton Plaza Regal cinema. "We're going to see a movie?"  
  
Bobby nodded and smiled making his way over to the ticket booth. "Two for 'Eight Legged Freaks'," he told the lady.  
  
"You're joking right? Hobbes, I don't want to see this movie," Darien grabbed his arm.  
  
"What are you worried about? It isn't real, and maybe if you sit through it you'll come to terms with your fear. I'll even buy you some nachos," he offered.  
  
"Fine. But if this gives me nightmares I'll kick your ass," Darien threatened.  
  
Bobby laughed. "It won't. And since when did you gain fighting skills? Or did you forget that I'm trained in Hopkido," he reminded him as he grabbed the tickets.  
  
Darien just shook his head and followed Bobby into the theater. They made their way into a row balancing the food and soda before sitting down. The lights went dim and the pre-movie entertainment began.  
  
"I really hate these Fandango promos. And why do we have commercials anyway? I mean, having to sit thru several previews is bad enough," Darien complained.  
  
"Amen, Fawkes. Too bad we can fast forward thru them," Bobby rolled his eyes and took a sip from his drink.  
  
Darien smiled and munched on the nachos. He almost choked when the preview for 'Stealing Harvard' started. One line made him grimace.  
  
"I came here to rob the old man and ended up in a dress and a wig and spooning with him."  
  
He gave Bobby a harsh glare when he heard him snicker. "Not ONE word, Hobbes. Don't even THINK it!"  
  
They both settled in when the movie finally started. Darien decided that he'd try to enjoy himself some, but that went right out the window the first time the spiders came on the screen. They were all varying in size kept in small tanks, and being feed crickets that had been contaminated with toxic waste.  
  
"At least we know how they get so big," Bobby whispered.  
  
Darien fought the urge to strangle Bobby for doing this to him. He almost leapt out of his skin when the one spider escaped and claimed it's first victim. "That's just gross," he commented.  
  
"Remember, Fawkes, it's JUST a movie," Bobby stated reassuringly.  
  
Darien did relax some as the movie continued. For some reason, as the spiders grew larger he became less afraid. Probably because somewhere his brain reminded him that spiders couldn't ever get that big, plus they started making noises like "Ow... ow... ow..." whenever they got hurt.  
  
They shared a glance when the one officer called the Department of Fish and Game for help in finding the increasing number of missing pets, and got no aid from them.  
  
"If the fat man ever sends us on a job like that, I quit," Darien told him.  
  
"I would second that. Mutant spiders are defiantly *NOT* in my job description."  
  
The rest of the movie went by fairly fast, Darien grimacing on occasion when the spiders caught people and wrapped them in webbing, or killed them. He was relieved when the credits started and stood up heading for the men's room.  
  
"Now that wasn't so bad was it?" Bobby asked him while the were washing their hands.  
  
"For YOU maybe. Next time you get an idea like that I'm gonna AHH---!!" he shouted as a spider dangled in front of him causing him to jump back.   
  
A smile curved on Bobby's lips as he noted that Darien didn't go see through this time. "See. You're still spooked, but not as badly."  
  
Darien blinked for a minute before he replied. "Heh, I don't believe it. Your plan actually worked."  
  
"Bobby Hobbes always comes through for his partner," he said.   
  
Darien gave him a low five and they walked out to the van. "Let's go get a pizza, my treat."  
  
  
Fin. 


End file.
